I took my little brother out, to quickly seal a deal but on our way,
We saw a mob approaching, stealthy, steady, menacing, armed
To the teeth, daring us to progress. Scared, we turned, we ran,
Towards alternative routes, but lo, other groups advancing,
With faces a horror, every step a threat, a promise of death.
Every route blocked, there was no way out. Home came to mind.
I wanted to call home, alert them of looming danger but alas,
I left my phone at home. “Let’s go back home, there’s trouble
In town,” my brother implored, clutching my hand in fright.
I saw reason and we ran for home sweet home, no place like
Home but lo, our beautiful abode has metamorphosed into
An ugly history as on that path too, another group approached,
Sweeping through an area once familiar, leaving destruction
And death behind. Trapped in the middle, I held to my little one,
He clenched with undying grip: I looked into his innocent eyes,
Fear unuttered; fear for future that never will be, fear for evil
That never should be, fear for life and for all that once were dear.
Fear in my brother’s eyes squeezed my soul, I panicked; him or me,
Who should be spared if we get a chance? He is too young to die.
My dreams are too dear to be sacrificed. Confusion mounted terror,
We scrambled, they pounced, like farmers, cutting grasses, weeding,
Weapons missing naught. Confirming the dead, scaling, shoving corpses,
They advanced as they hacked, we cried as we ran, we called as we fell,
With no one to hear, no help in sight: like weeds unwanted, uprooted
We fell, we died; without a chance, without a choice, without a voice.
© Glory C. Odemene, 2015

For reasons I can’t explain, I have seen visions of invasion a couple of times and for each, I lived the fear of watching day turn to darkness, caught in the mayhem as innocent lives are raided and overran, without time to think, with neither help nor escape in sight. Have you ever come face to face with death, caught unawares and bound by helplessness as you and all that you held dear are wiped off like nothing? I don’t know anything as scary as death, more so a gruesome one.

In the last vision, I had stepped out of our secured home with my kid brother to quickly go take care of something and come back. We never made it back. Every road and path we knew were overtaken. And typical of me, I had forgotten my mobile phone at home so there was no means of alerting them or calling for help if there was any. When we tried to return to the safety of the home we left just a few minutes ago, the devastation that met our eyes spelled clearly our fate. We couldn’t even reach home because the enemy had cleared everything behind and were pressing in on us from every side. Those who ran into houses were either forced out by raging fires or roasted with their determination to stay put.

I held my brother, thinking how could I save him, how I could save me. The enemy was upturning and clearing every single thing and person as they advanced. The killers became a wall around the area we once lived and worked and played. We ran helter skelter, but there was no hiding place as they closed in, taking down every soul in sheer brutality. No one was spared; old and young, pregnant and infirm. Even the strong, overtaken by the suddenness of the attack, could not escape, defend, or protect themselves.

There are no words to compare that experience. Not even a farmer weeding comes close. Despite the similarities, the farmer weeds selectively. He clears weeds and allows wheat or whatever plant he is in interested in to live. That is not so here. The farm that is our area, was totally being cleared, by destroyers who know and care not about farming. In their violent agenda, we were not worth consideration, not worthy to live. Though our lives meant nothing to them, and our living infringed not on their rights and missions, yet deviously determined, they devoured and gutted us, one after the other. They took over the chars of our heritage, which they lusted after although it meant nothing to them.

There is a popular saying that human beings often do not appreciate what they have until they lose it – may that not be our case because that is a very expensive way to learn appreciation. In spite of whatever you are going through, have you imagined what it feels like to live in constant fear; fear for your life, fear for your family, fear of the next moment, wary of trouble, sensing it is near, and not knowing when, where, and how it will pounce? Have you lived under that condition where your loved ones step out and your heart remains in your mouth until they return; where you are working but you can’t focus because you are multitasking being alert just in case terror descends; where you are sitting in church and wondering which of those strolling in could be a bomber; where you see children in need and you can’t help though you want to because you can’t tell which is wearing a ticking bomb; where everyday places like markets, malls, parking areas have turned to landmines detonating with reckless abandon; where every little sound startles you; every sign frightens you; you can’t sleep at night because you are wishing it is day, and when it is dawn, you long for darkness to hide you and your family?

I am not trying to stir fear? I am only sharing what I felt in the visions, caught in the middle of troubles I didn’t start, couldn’t stop, and couldn’t help. The visions were probably for a while and each time I woke, my heart in my hand, I saw the eyeballs of fear, I prayed like never before. To me, it was only a dream. Yet, there are many to whom this has become reality; a norm they sleep with and wake up daily to. Fear is a terrible neighbor!

Apart from rousing sensitivity towards the plight of so many out there who are living thus, it has heightened my appreciation for freedom. The utter relief of freedom; of being able to lay aside, the cares of the day, get into bed at night, and enjoy peaceful sleep. To wake at your time (not because you were roused by some danger alarms), get out of bed and stretch at your pace (not forced to jump out and run for cover), to embrace loved ones in ease and under the assurance of safety, enjoy communion (without running and weeping, wondering what has become the fate of each). O the things we take for granted!

I am hopeful that you will, despite your challenges, savor your freedom – it is priceless! Don’t allow daily issues of life to rubbish the beauty of liberty. It is only as a free citizen that you can think and plan to deal with issues appropriately. And to a man who is free, there is hope of resolution for whatever bugs him. If you ask those uprooted, your biggest issues are the least on their list – they just want to live, free and well. All they ask for is a chance to live, a right to live. What could be greater than that?

I hope that you will appreciate the freedom you have today, while it is still yours. We live in a very unstable world where times and things change so fast it is hard to catch up sometimes. I pray that you will never lose your freedom; that when you go to work, when you meet in church, when you are together with friends and families, you are not looking over your shoulders and jumping at the slightest sounds. I pray that you will be at peace with yourself no matter your problems. I pray that you will be at peace with your friends and families no matter how they may have offended you. I pray that in your peace and safety, you will remember those who have lost theirs. I pray that when you remember them, you will do for them, whatever lies within your power, which you would have wished, that others would do for you, if tables were turned. Amen.

Glory!