Heavy and hurting, heaving this weight
That has grown within me, with time:
This transient regime threatens to last forever
I’d be dead before eternity finds me like this!
Restless and cautious I trudge through routines
I can no longer endure and drag through those
That I can, wondering, when will my bubble burst?
I can no longer wait but I have no choice
I am bound to linger however I please.
I can choose to burn every passing moment
Grouchy and grumpy about the pregnancy
That defies my wishes and delays delivery
I can choose to merry in the knowledge
Of the awesome miracle taking place within
I can raise the roof with praise or wails
I can shed tears of adoration or frustration
I can throw pity party or form glory band
My choices in the waiting room will define
Maybe not when but how the baby comes.
Today, I shall retreat and reassess
I shall wear a smile on this ordeal
Attract with cheer, the help I repelled
And fiddle with joy till my time comes.
I have experienced God’s amazing miracles in the most awkward places and times. Yet, I think I’ve spent most of my life in God’s waiting room. Like I’m always waiting for one thing or the other. One comes through and creates a need for the other. Then I have to put in a request and get on the waiting line again. Sometimes, answers come in no time. I must admit, some have shown up so accurate, without my asking. And I must also confess, some have taken so long that I’ve been tempted to quit on it. Yet, the choice is mine; to wait in trust that the faithful God will do as He has promised or to cast aside the promise and move on with what’s cool.
In the course of waiting, I have learned to look farther than where I am right now, to look way beyond “Wants or perceived needs” of the moment. And looking far ahead, to try and evaluate what I would be needing down the road. That way, I can lay my short and long terms requests before Abba and know that at the least, I have done my part, in good time. Would that guarantee timely answers? It depends on who and what defines “timely.” On the basis that God is never late, His time will always be the best no matter how far it is from our time.
As I get out of my world and mingle around, I also realize that I am not the only one pregnant with expectations, every one of us is. I am not the only one who has spent countless hours in God’s waiting room, we all do at different points in our lives for varying reasons. So it’s not about checking into the waiting room, it is what we do while we are there. It is not about how long we spend there, it is how we handle the labors of waiting and what we come out of that room with. And faith makes all the difference in the outcomes. Bearing this in mine, may your attitude while you wait be grace, may patience wait with you, for as long as is needful, and may peace and fulfilment lead you out each time, amen!
Blessings
Glory!