Standing on holy ground, bowed in awesome moment
The secular defied the sacred; trampled in, defiling.
Sore vexed, I lunged and cast out the dirt, relieved
Until His voice came, “Why do you maltreat Me?”
Befuddled I wondered, “No Lord, You I adore
Defend Your holiness I did: aren’t You impressed.”
Awaiting a pat, I felt a slap: “What you did to her,
You did to Me.” Shame robbed satisfaction
Humility pride and I bowed, repentant
Reckoning – His way is sure not my style.
Our paths won’t cross my way:
“Show me Your way O God!
Teach me, in Your steps to walk
Or else I’m lost: my way is far from Yours.”

Someone close offended my brother. The young man was unforgiving and the strain was stretching. I intervened and he said, “This is not the first time. How can this person do this again and again and expect me to understand and forgive? I’m done.” Knowing my brother, I had to provide a little enlightenment that proved helpful which is equally vital as we navigate the paths of life.

We all develop attitudes based on our backgrounds that become and define our norms. People with shielded upbringing acquire certain characters that become standard to them. Same goes for people who were raised in lack: they develop mechanisms to make up for missing essentials and these also become their norm. Then life throws these two groups together and there is confusion. But that is what life is: a school that teaches lessons that escaped the classrooms. They could be strength in one area that turns meanness if due consideration is not applied. They could be weakness that helped us get by in the past which the present now demands changed. Yet, they are integral parts of who are, part of who we must embrace or exchange to meet the evolution of times and circumstances.

Having lived on both ends, I see it clearer and understand better: that people don’t always do what they’d prefer, circumstances can be more compelling and it takes the grace of God to beat them. It takes the grace of God to stretch beyond habits that come natural to find the appropriate ground. It takes the grace of God to find a balance in between and maintain it despite the pull of what we are used to. It takes grace to discern and deliver the appropriate. Yes, the grace is always there but it is a constant battle to not fall back to your norm which is actually unacceptable. We will always be faced with sliding along with what comes first to us or sweating some to resist what we are used to falling for.

Grace places a demand on us to relentlessly pursue changes we need to make and not give up, and to bear with the shortcomings of others may not be where we are yet. Not to make excuses for them or encourage what should be changed, but in love, to accommodate as much as we can for the good of all. The world is the way it is because the majority are adamant on their ways, refusing to make room for others, wanting everyone and everything their way. Peace is far from such relationships. True change is hardly an instant product. It takes commitment, discipline, patience and loads of encouragement from those who care. And if you get to the point where you know it is unbearable, it may be time to step away. Nevertheless whatever steps we take must be in love.

Irrespective of what your own case may be, there is always a middle ground. Sometimes we don’t see it. Sometimes we are not even aware, which is why we need that communion with God’s Spirit and His Word: critical pointers that highlight these areas that we often miss. That communion awakens yielded hearts to little foxes that ruin fruitful vines; helping us identify the logs in our own eyes, to deal with them so we can see clearer and help better, with whatever is in the eyes of others. That communion makes us aware and responsible for actively addressing the aspects that must be held open to the Holy Spirit’s transformation in our own lives. On our own, change is tough but with God, all things are possible to them who believe and walk in line with their faith. Trust God to guide you; to help you accommodate others however they come; to grant understanding when their weaknesses get in the way again and again; to help us make relevant changes where necessary; and to be able to sustain the changes unto fruitful end.

Glory!