It was mine to cherish and tend
And no less would I, for as long as I could.
My life has been on forever-pause until now
Faith restrained famished desire from dying
On me. At last it found me: hope found my home
Reality kissed my dream! Joyfully dandled
In endearing arms, embracing, internalizing
Savoring, readying for this new life I awaited
For so long. That’s when He came asking
Seeking my surrender. No! Not now! Not ever!
At least, not yet! Still surrender He seeks
He can take it but He doesn’t: He asks, He waits.
“Not fair!” Screams my seething soul, seeking
The route of rebellion but sober heart counseled
“He gives, He takes, He knows what’s best
Don’t fight a battle you never will win
Give if He asks, bless though it hurts
Trust in His care, go it His way, let His will
And know that in the end, He’ll make it all good
This time is too ephemeral to lose it all for
He’s got eternity to make it up to you.”
Years back, a dear friend gave up a lucrative appointment in the oil and gas industry and headed into the wilderness to answer the call to be a missionary. He took with him a young family that was raised in the city and used to comfort. They all relocated to this rural place to answer the call that left many befuddled. I followed them closely through the years. It was not an easy trip but not once did they complain about things that had to be given up or new conditions they had to bear. In fact, it all turned one hilarious adventure for my mischievous friend who thrives on anything outside the box with Abba. Today, he is back again, God having arranged a very juicy appointment he couldn’t refuse, in such a way that it is so clearly God and God alone.
We are so focused on the now; on all we are wanting and needing and not having, on all we can have and are yet to see, and on all others are enjoying while we are waiting and wanting still. Because we are not wearing their shoes, we assume life is fairer on them over there than it is with us down here. We look longingly across, from where we are to where they are, wishing we were there instead of here, wishing we were like them instead of who we are. And despite our desires, our wishing and longing, our focus on now robs us of the bigger picture: that God is behind the scenes of life, working all things together for the good of those who trust Him.
Many of us are limited where we are today because we fear to surrender what is in our hands to the Shepherd. We are afraid of taking risks. We fear daring outside our comfort zones. We fear any offer that comes without guarantees. We fear to let go. We want change but we fear the process and shy away when it knocks on our door for fear of being left wanting. Even when it is taken away from us, we struggle to hold on, we refuse to give it up, we hang onto the shadow of what once was and is no more because our focus on now denies us the chance to see beyond what is to what can become in the place of surrender.
Whatever serves as security can turn into a cage that stifles advancement. The good things of life should be enjoyed when we have them. Nevertheless, our focus, our hope and our trust must be jealously be guarded so these things don’t steal or shift them from God. What comfort does this story provide as we carry our crosses daily? No matter where you find yourself, keep your eyes on Jesus. Everything in life comes and goes but His love endures forever. Unlike those of us who are struggling with God and getting hurt because we are not willing to let go, this young man chose to give up his without much ado. It takes the risk of faith to give up what is dear for “nothing” or for something that is not certain. It takes faith to enjoy the journey God is taking us on without being discouraged or dissuaded by the challenges of the trip. And it takes patience to get to the other side where you look back and realize that what He has in store is always greater than whatever He asks of us.
Blessings
Glory!